did you know that teachers are instructed to get in between two boys in an altercation and break their eye contact because boys will disengage once the immediate situation is interrupted but they’re instructed to like never ever get in between two girls in a fight because girls wont stop after they lose sight and will actively try to go through whatever’s in between them and teachers are supposed to wait for security to break the shit apart
teenage girls will fuck your shit up
i literally have no idea what im gonna do if i dont end up rich
overheard at the dominos I work at:
"pizza seller. I am going on a delivery and I need your strongest pizzas."
"you cannot handle my strongest pizzas, driver"
i was babysitting a little boy and girl once and the boy asked me if i had a boyfriend and i said “no!! but i have a girlfriend!” and he said “like a friend thats a girl?” and i said “no like a boyfriend but they’re a girl instead of a boy! we still do couple things but we’re just both girls” and he said, without missing a beat, “oh ok! are you gonna marry her?”
like it’s literally that easy for kids to understand
Children > Adults
what if people’s hair changed color based on their emotions
like one day you’re out getting a cup of coffee and you notice some cutie in the back of the coffeeshop and your hair starts turning bright pink and you do you best to try to hide it but you can’t help but look over and
they’re just sitting there, staring at you, their face as flushed as their locks
i seen someone on here say “daddy spank me like an almost empty ketchup bottle” and since then i just been usin a knife to get the sauce out the bottle
hi im here to colonize *points at canada* thats mine
haha about that,